Repo Ahoy, Matey!
There are some jobs that must be tough on the old self-image.
Lately, I’ve had a hard time with the army of meter maids spreading joy on every street corner in New York.
Its an alternative congestion pricing plan. There are other more objectionable
lines of work, of course. There’s always the bails bondmen, ropin’ em up, and
bringin’ em. But now, more prevalent than ever, is the repo man.
These days its not only the family car that we’re seeing
hauled away in the wee hours, for non-payment. Its another casualty of the
free-wheeling lending spirit that is now a faded memory. Its our “Jersey Girl”,
or “Aquaholic”, or “A Wave from it All”.
Aye, captain. It’s the family boat.
The refinancing craze drove the recreational boating
industry, and we saw a 40% rise in luxury cruisers, miniyachts and sailboats
from 2000 – 2006. The average loan tripled to $141,000. Now, these “Chickens of the Sea” have come home to roost. Home equity has
fallen off a cliff, boat sales with it. Gas prices pour fuel on the fire. Boats
make Hummers look energy efficient.
And so these are the salad days for the repo men. Economic
downturns always are, but this one especially. The leverage was unlike anything
ever seen. Repo operators have expanded,
some have grown to double or triple in size. I can’t wait until the boat
foreclosure ads start hitting late night TV.
The stories offer tragic human interest, riveting reality TV
content for those of us who relate. Misery loves company, ya know. Some of the
fools among us learn the hard way. Some repo men have actually repossessed the same
boat, from the same owner, 3-4 times.